If you were raising your kids to be president, Tiger Woods, etc., then would you be doing if differently? You are raising the parents of tomorrow. It’s all energy and how we use it.

- Tell them they are valuable just because they are in the world and they won the race (the race of billions of sperms and they are the only ones who made it!). Say: “You make my day, your smile lights up the room, No matter what, I’m glad to be your parent”.

o In order to be an adult, you have to be a child. You have to laugh when they’re covered in spaghetti, play, be a kid with your kid, connect, and teach.

· Children see and hear the world differently than adults
· Reading and writing out lines at school can be seen as punishment

If you say something and you get a different reaction, they probably have heard something else

For instance, the kid tripped and broke pottery they made for Mum. Mom said: “it’s ok you, can make another”. The kid thinks mom hates him. The kid heard that what he did wasn’t a big deal cause the pottery wasn’t important, as it could be replaced; therefore, Mom doesn’t care about him.

· Don’t deal with the behavior, but look under the behavior.
· Apologies are meaningless lies. “Tell your sibling you’re sorry and say it like you mean it “. We are implying, lie, even though you don’t mean it. Instead, tell them to say they’re sorry only when it’s heartfelt, to own their behavior, such as “it was wrong of me to”. They don’t have to be sorry if they’re not.

Kids need alternatives to anger and disappointment. What are they supposed to do instead of yelling, or slamming door. Teach them what’s ok to do and help them to replace it, such as shoot hoops, hit pillow, and scream in room.

Explain to them that feelings are not how they feel. You don’t really feel that way. You don’t mean it. For instance, I hate my teacher. You don’t really hate your teacher.

Don’t do things for them because it’s faster, such as tying shoes. You’re telling them they are incompetent to do it. Can you think of other examples?

To learn more, contact me for a complimentary evaluation. Remember that your children are important and they are our hope for the future. Stay tuned for more blogs and articles.

Elena Pezzini, M.S., C.P.C., A.B.D.
You Have Got The Power, Inc.
You Got The Power, non profit organization
Strategic Internet Psychology
Office (702) 518-6649 Fax (251) 217-0082
http://www.YouHaveGotThePower.com
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